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Striving For Balance

Updated: Apr 7, 2020

Life is like a tightrope. While we don’t ask for it, we’re forced to walk it. We all start with different equipment, too. Some of us have better balance. Others have more to juggle while they walk. Some even get a unicycle, and can cover more distance at a faster rate. We’ll walk over scary places, but also have a beautiful view if we ever stop and look around. Despite all of those things, we’ll be one step away from falling. Some of us may be terrified of that, and others completely unaware. But one thing we will have in common: we don’t want to fall.

I don’t know anyone who wakes up thinking “I’d like to have a bad day” or “I hope I argue with family or friends.” The reality is, most of us want to get up and have a smooth day. That doesn’t necessarily mean that everything goes right, but we do want to feel as if things are going right. It’s more about our feeling of the situation, instead of the situation itself.

When I was in grad school, I learned about homeostasis. Simply put, homeostasis is a desire to keep things in balance. We look for stability, without giving it a second thought. We quickly confirm the idea that we are creatures of habit. But what happens when our habits lead to an unhealthy lifestyle?

Imagine growing up in a family where every day you wake up to tension. You go about your normal schedule and never identify that anything is wrong. Maybe nothing is? After all, it’s not out of the ordinary for parents to argue, or siblings to fight, or for things to go wrong. You give that uneasy feeling little thought as days turn into weeks, into years. While you feel frustrated, it’s never that bad. Eventually you grow comfortable with the unidentified tension in the room.

Fast forward to adulthood. You find a partner that you’re crazy about. You couldn’t be happier. You get married, start a career, and have kids. You then find yourself creating that same tense environment without giving it a second thought. You recreate the cycle that you grew up in. Your kids never identify that anything is wrong, but the effects of stress and conflict influence them all the same. You see your family become the one you grew up in, and all from staying in your comfort zone.

Thankfully, life doesn’t have to be like this. We’ve been equipped to overcome our comfort zones and develop healthy habits in order to break free of tension, anxiety, anger, etc. We can live balanced and fulfilled lives. That doesn’t mean you won’t encounter challenges along the way. But it does mean that you can respond to those challenges feeling confident in your ability to overcome them.

So where is your point of balance today? Do you feel like you are ready for the next challenge in your life? Or do you feel overwhelmed by the thought of continuing another day in disagreement, bitterness, or exhaustion? Maybe you’re close to falling off your tightrope? Or you recently did? If you feel concerned about your ability to tackle the next challenge, then it’s time to seek help. Remember that tension in your life will only last as long as you allow it to. It may not be easy to overcome, but it can be done. Give us a call today to learn more about making your life look the way you want it to look. — Jeremy Jordan

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